It’s been Days, Weeks, Months
since I have been here because I have been buried under our new bundle of joy! Sweet, little Will Franklin has had so many challenges since birth. I think he liked the womb best. It’s tested my resolve. I am worn out, I am tired! But in all this, my heart and soul has bonded to this little boy like I didn’t know possible.
In his first 8 weeks of life, if he wasn’t sleeping or eating he was crying. I don’t just mean every once in a while. I mean every waking minute. The verse, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God” became my husband and I ‘s constant prayer. We have tried so many things, pro-biotics, chiropractic care, visited the pediatrician several times, homeopathy, sac-cranial therapy (never in my life heard of it until this babes), 8 different pacifiers, and all of these things are to just name a few of the things that we have done. We have cried, we have been worried (that there was something terribly wrong), we have prayed. He has consumed our every waking moments.
He is now 12 weeks and we have new, other issues. Thrush and a nasty cough that is startling. I walked into Salvation Army the other day and he had a nasty round of coughing and all the heads turned and looked at me as if to say, “Woman, what is wrong with your baby?” I just wanted to run, and run fast but I pulled myself together and reminded myself that he is ok per the Dr. Lungs are clear, oxygen and respiratory levels are good. The cough keeps us awake at night because it wrecks you when you hear your ‘wee one’ miserable. Our best defense at this point has been essential oils that help him with his breathing and breast feeding. Our pediatrician (who has a great reputation in our county) would have hospitalized him if he would have had a fever of 100.4 but he hasn’t spiked a fever once during this time and looks at us and smiles, which melts us all into a puddle especially after the first 8 weeks. All that to say he seems to feel good except for the cough. And the Dr told me to go on with normal life.
So this is my world and it’s my ‘hard’. 3 months have slipped by and I am still emerging from the little piles that are sitting all around me in my house. Projects, things left undone because they really aren’t important. I hardly read my Bible these days but then I happen on verses that speak to my heart (my heart really does long to sit in His presence but I hardly get a shower or get my kids fed so long, glowing times with the Lord are out). Or I hear something and I am in awe of the One so great who loves me. Genesis 28:16 says it best as I wonder thru these moments in time. “Surely the LORD is in this place, and I wasn’t even aware of it!”
As I am reflecting HE truly has been in my moments, they just look different then I would have thought they would be.
I am counting my blessings, and I have them in 4 precious babies and 1 wonderful husband. This is to only name the biggest of my blessings. There are a thousand more! Because I have friends who are hurting, one of my dear friends lost her dad very unexpectedly at the young age of 60 (he was an outstanding man and has left an incredible legacy). And then there is one of my husband’s colleagues who is losing his wife to cancer at the young age of 30ish and I am sure you know people around you who are carrying deep pain in their hearts over something. So I go back to the verse, “Surely the LORD is in place, and I wasn’t even aware of it!”.
Cheers to a lovely week, as you look for the moments that Jesus shows up in your life!